Of Hollywood and Lemon Cake

There are ten movies nominated for Best Picture this year and all I can ask is why? In past years it has been a stretch to come up with five, here's what I think of the 2010 ten, for 2009...

Avatar, I haven't seen it. I don't want to wear glasses over my glasses, but will for Alice In Wonderland.

The Blind Side, ugh.

District 9, surprisingly, really good.

An Education, don't stand, don't stand so close to me, where are Sting and the boys when you need them?

The Hurt Locker, really? I fell asleep watching this movie.

Inglorious Basterds, or how WWII should have ended. I loved it.

Precious, hard to watch, really good.

A Serious Man, never heard of it.

Up, best movie I saw last year.

Up In The Air, Hollywood tells us what it's like to be fired. Please don't, although, George would take the sting out of being canned.

What's going to win? Probably Avatar, or knowing Hollywood, it will be A Serious Man. They do love the obscure. Who heard of Slumdog Millionaire before the awards season last year?

Will I watch? Yes, I love to see the gowns and what get-up Mickey Rourke will wear. In honor of the occasion, I will make my Great-Aunt Matt's Hollywood Lemon Cake. This cake is great for parties, it's old fashioned and really easy. Everyone loves it. Sorry about the picture, this was the last piece.

Hollywood Lemon Cake

Preheat oven to 350 degrees

1 Yellow Cake Mix

1 Box Lemon Jell-O

3 Eggs

2/3 cup Oil

1 cup water

2 Tbsp Fresh Lemon Juice

1 Tbsp Fresh Grated Lemon Zest, one lemon should do it

Combine all ingredients and mix with electric mixer for 2 minutes. Pour into prepared, (greased and floured), 9X13 pan. Bake at 350 degrees for 25 to 30 minutes if using glass, 30-40 if using metal. Cake is done when a toothpick or knife is inserted and comes out clean. Glaze upon removing from oven.

Glaze

2 cups Powdered Sugar

1/3 to 1/2 cup Fresh Lemon Juice, usually two lemons.

Mix glaze while cake is baking. When cake comes out of oven and while still hot, poke holes all over top with fork, going down to the bottom of the pan. Spread glaze over top of hot cake. I try not to let it all go down the sides, so glaze slowly.

Red Riding Trilogy

Based on David Peace's Red Riding Quartet, these three films were made for British TV, by BBC Channel 4. Written for the screen by Tony Grisoni. Titled 1974, 1980, and 1983. The three films also include actual events that have been greatly dramatized. Mainly, they are about two serial killers, amid the backdrop of rampant police corruption.

I kept hearing about these movies and how "Brilliant" they were. I still think there are a lot of reviewers who think if it's foreign, and obscure, it must be the best thing ever made. Elements of the films were like the finest of British Noir, think Get Carter. Gritty, bleak, and nihilistic. Those were the parts I liked.

Watching these three films was like watching paint dry in a foreign language. I know they were speaking English, I'm sure of it. However, with thick Yorkshire accents, who the hell could understand them, except a fellow Yorkshireman? You could not throw a cat without hitting a "nowt" or a "somat", I mean, I think Sean Bean turned in a fine performance, based on body language and facial expressions alone. All I know for sure is he was a construction contractor who was obsessed with swans, kind of skeezy and used the verb were way too much.

Which leads us to ALLEGORY. I had to shout it, because these films really whack you over the head with the concept. Wolves, rats, swans, corruption, innocence, sin, redemption, carnality, purity and on and on and on. Mostly, these films were confusing and disjointed. I don't think it helped having three different directors.

If you're looking for a gripping thriller about serial killers watch Silence of The Lambs or The Boston Strangler. If you want gritty Brit-Noir, rent Get Carter, the original with Michael Caine, or even The Third Man, voted number 1 film by the British Film Industry.